By Emma Rizzella-Roberts
WHAT IS SELF ESTEEM?
What is self-esteem? Self-esteem is a term used to describe a person’s overall sense of self-worth or personal value. Self-esteem can be affected by family, friends, childhood, education, etc. There are two basic types of self-esteem: high self-esteem and low self-esteem.
HIGH SELF ESTEEM
High self-esteem is when a person has a good opinion of themselves. People with high self-esteem tend to be confident in their abilities to make certain decisions, assertive in expressing needs and opinions and have the ability to form a healthy relationship(s). However, people with too much self-esteem are prone to feel that they are more superior than others, believe that their needs come first before anything else, and may struggle in improving behavior and learning.
LOW SELF ESTEEM
Low self-esteem is when a person is unhappy or unsatisfied with themselves. Low self-esteem may lead to mental illnesses like depression. There are many sources that cause this type of esteem, such as traumas, bullying, and disapproving guardians/family.
HOW TO BUILD YOUR SELF ESTEEM
The first step to recovering your self-esteem is to take a self-esteem inventory. This is one of the main components of cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). Before working on your CBT, you have to spend some time recognizing illogical thoughts and such. The second step is to set realistic expectations. Nothing can kill your self-esteem more than setting up unrealistic goals in life. Realistic goals may help you stop the cycle of negative thoughts about yourself that reinforce low self-esteem. Unrealistic goals however, can make a person feel more depressed than they were if they don’t succeed. For example, John M. Grohol, Psy.D. said “when I was in my 20s, I had thought, ‘I need to be a millionaire by the time I’m 30 or I’m going to be a failure.’ (Don’t even get me started about how many things are wrong with that statement.) Needless to say, 30 came and I was nowhere close to being a millionaire. I was more in debt than ever, and owning a home was still a distant dream. My expectation was unrealistic, and my self-esteem took a blow when I turned 30 and saw how far away such a goal was” (Psychcentral.com (6 tips to improve your self-Esteem, 2017).
Now put perfection aside and grab hold of your accomplishments as well as mistakes. You as a person will never have the perfect life, perfect relationships, or a perfect home. Perfection is simply an artificial creation in society, it doesn’t exist. Instead, grab hold of the things you’ve accomplished and acknowledge their value to yourself. It is also important to acknowledge your mistakes in life. Making mistakes does not mean you’re a bad person, It means that you are human and that you just made a mistake, like everyone else does.
Explore yourself. Know your strengths and weaknesses, as well as trying something new and taking risks every once in a while is always a good experience to improve low self-esteem. Learning these new subjects is how people can become the people they have always wanted to be.
Adjust your self-image. Your self-esteem is useless if it’s based on an “older version” of yourself that no longer exists. Everyone changes over-time. “But all of that’s okay. I’ve adjusted my own beliefs about myself and my strengths as I go along. I’ve become a better writer, and learned more about business than I ever knew before. I don’t sit around and say, ‘Geez, I really wish I could play trombone like I used to!’ (And if I cared enough to really think that, I would go and take some lessons to get good at it again.) Instead, I evaluate myself based upon what’s going on in my life right now, not some distant past version of me.” Says John M. Grohol at Psychcentral.com (6 tips to improve your self-Esteem, 2017)
Don’t compare yourself to others. Nothing can lower your self-esteem more than comparing yourself to another. This can really impact the way you think about yourself. Instead of competing yourself to others, compete with yourself. Only you know yourself better than anyone else on this globe. This way, there would not be any unfair comparisons when competing with others just incase there is something you don’t know about your opponent.
WHAT IS SELF ESTEEM?
What is self-esteem? Self-esteem is a term used to describe a person’s overall sense of self-worth or personal value. Self-esteem can be affected by family, friends, childhood, education, etc. There are two basic types of self-esteem: high self-esteem and low self-esteem.
HIGH SELF ESTEEM
High self-esteem is when a person has a good opinion of themselves. People with high self-esteem tend to be confident in their abilities to make certain decisions, assertive in expressing needs and opinions and have the ability to form a healthy relationship(s). However, people with too much self-esteem are prone to feel that they are more superior than others, believe that their needs come first before anything else, and may struggle in improving behavior and learning.
LOW SELF ESTEEM
Low self-esteem is when a person is unhappy or unsatisfied with themselves. Low self-esteem may lead to mental illnesses like depression. There are many sources that cause this type of esteem, such as traumas, bullying, and disapproving guardians/family.
HOW TO BUILD YOUR SELF ESTEEM
The first step to recovering your self-esteem is to take a self-esteem inventory. This is one of the main components of cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). Before working on your CBT, you have to spend some time recognizing illogical thoughts and such. The second step is to set realistic expectations. Nothing can kill your self-esteem more than setting up unrealistic goals in life. Realistic goals may help you stop the cycle of negative thoughts about yourself that reinforce low self-esteem. Unrealistic goals however, can make a person feel more depressed than they were if they don’t succeed. For example, John M. Grohol, Psy.D. said “when I was in my 20s, I had thought, ‘I need to be a millionaire by the time I’m 30 or I’m going to be a failure.’ (Don’t even get me started about how many things are wrong with that statement.) Needless to say, 30 came and I was nowhere close to being a millionaire. I was more in debt than ever, and owning a home was still a distant dream. My expectation was unrealistic, and my self-esteem took a blow when I turned 30 and saw how far away such a goal was” (Psychcentral.com (6 tips to improve your self-Esteem, 2017).
Now put perfection aside and grab hold of your accomplishments as well as mistakes. You as a person will never have the perfect life, perfect relationships, or a perfect home. Perfection is simply an artificial creation in society, it doesn’t exist. Instead, grab hold of the things you’ve accomplished and acknowledge their value to yourself. It is also important to acknowledge your mistakes in life. Making mistakes does not mean you’re a bad person, It means that you are human and that you just made a mistake, like everyone else does.
Explore yourself. Know your strengths and weaknesses, as well as trying something new and taking risks every once in a while is always a good experience to improve low self-esteem. Learning these new subjects is how people can become the people they have always wanted to be.
Adjust your self-image. Your self-esteem is useless if it’s based on an “older version” of yourself that no longer exists. Everyone changes over-time. “But all of that’s okay. I’ve adjusted my own beliefs about myself and my strengths as I go along. I’ve become a better writer, and learned more about business than I ever knew before. I don’t sit around and say, ‘Geez, I really wish I could play trombone like I used to!’ (And if I cared enough to really think that, I would go and take some lessons to get good at it again.) Instead, I evaluate myself based upon what’s going on in my life right now, not some distant past version of me.” Says John M. Grohol at Psychcentral.com (6 tips to improve your self-Esteem, 2017)
Don’t compare yourself to others. Nothing can lower your self-esteem more than comparing yourself to another. This can really impact the way you think about yourself. Instead of competing yourself to others, compete with yourself. Only you know yourself better than anyone else on this globe. This way, there would not be any unfair comparisons when competing with others just incase there is something you don’t know about your opponent.